Be still my pounding heart

Male Chastity: a Guide for KeyholdersWhile hand-to-gland combat was no longer occupying my time, I remained intent on convincing my wife, C, to, at least, try experimenting with male chastity and orgasm control. The question was how, exactly, to broach the subject. I think the reason I didn’t just jump in and tell her was fear. I was afraid that she might simply laugh or mock me or, even worse, that she might be horrified or view me as some sort of pervert. Also, I wasn’t sure that I would be able to explain what I wanted in a way that would be non-threatening to her.

One option was to focus on what she would gain from the experience. There is a mass of information on the interwebs emphasising the benefits for the keyholder. According to these sources, the chaste male becomes compliant and helpful, doing the housework and doting on his “Goddess”. Unfortunately, I don’t think C would have much interest in becoming a “Goddess” and I wasn’t too keen on becoming her maid. I should add that I already do much of the housework and almost all of the cooking since, at the moment, she goes out to work and I’m at home.

Another possibility was to aim a few web-links at her and let her find out for herself. The problem with this is that, while there is a great deal of information on the interwebs about male chastity and orgasm control, male chastity crosses a lot of areas which might be described as kinky. These range from hard core BDSM, where slaves or subs may be put into chastity as part of a 24/7 lifestyle, to men undergoing sissification or feminisation, sometimes with a cuckold element. While I definitely subscribe to the YKINMKBYKIO (your kink is not my kink but your kink is OK) viewpoint, I very much doubt that a photograph of a burly chap in a short, rubber maids uniform doing the dusting while sporting a CB 6000 would add to the persuasiveness of my argument.

There are relatively “vanilla” men/couples (I recommend Tom Allen at The Edge of Vanilla) who enjoy chastity but their voices can be drowned out by the hard core kinksters (and, of course, the out and out fantasists).

While perusing the interwebs, it was noticeable that one book was repeatedly recommended as a straightforward introduction to male chastity. This was “Male Chastity: a Guide for Keyholders” by Lucy Fairbourne. A concise, well-written review by lauren1fem can be found at Chastity Mansion Forums (Note: Chastity Mansion is a very friendly forum run by Mistress Watchful. There is an active sissy element to the forums so if this is likely to offend, don’t click the link) and is reproduced here with permission (thanks Mistress W and lauren1fem):

As the title suggests this book is aimed at a soon to be female keyholder of a would-be chastity-belted male. It is well-suited to a newbie keyholder or someone who may have been surprised by receiving the book from someone as a “gift”. It presumes the reader has obtained the book for several reasons, but the principal one is that a male interested in chastity has sprung this idea on his SO in hopes of acquiring her as his keyholder. This aspect may be the book’s greatest asset.

Introducing a kink like chastity into a relationship is made easier by the writer’s style and matter-of-fact approach to the female keyholder reader. It’s also a quick read and gives one a taste of the lifestyle without getting too bogged down in the detail.

There are a few sections that may be a bit contrived. The author suggests that you create a diary to track yours/his sexual frustration & horniness level before going out and buying a device. During this time the chaste male would have to use the honor system which could be problematic.

There is a good overview of various product types without naming manufacturers or endorsing any particular make/model. If you knew nothing about chastity belts this might be informative or set your mind at ease with the whole concept.

Final Analysis: If you are a husband hoping to get your wife or SO to be your keyholder this book is for you/her! (Note: To date I haven’t got the guts yet to spring this on my wife, but this book along with a brief request to “read it and then let’s talk” is what I would use to introduce the idea to her).

I decided to buy this book for C.

The book arrived and I wrapped it and enclosed a letter explaining that I was interested in male chastity, that I hadn’t gone mad, that I didn’t expect her to become a whip-wielding, leather-clad dominatrix, that I would accept it if she was completely against the whole idea and that I loved her. I asked her to read the book and then talk to me.

The next afternoon, with my heart pounding in my chest, I told C that I had something for her, gave her the package, said I would see her in 5 minutes and left the room.

To be continued…

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